1. My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn’t concentrate.
  2. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe.
  3. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it. The job was only so-so anyhow.
  4. Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was exhausting.
  5. I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn’t cut it.
  6. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I couldn’t cut the mustard.
  7. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn’t note worthy.
  8. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn’t have any patience.
  9. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried, but I just didn’t fit in.
  10. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income.
  11. I thought about becoming a witch, so I tried that for a spell.
  12. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.
  13. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit, because it was always the same old grind.
  14. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, until I realized there was no future in it.