1. We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
2. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
3. Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
4. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
5. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
6. Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.
7. My mind is like a steel trap, rusty and illegal in 37 states.
8. Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
9. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
10. I've only been wrong once, and that's when I thought I was wrong.
Thanks for the laugh.
😀