Signs That Santa Claus Might Actually Be a Woman

Mrs Claus

There are several signs that Santa Claus might be a woman:-

  1. Santa *remembers* it’s Christmas. (Say no more)
  2. Santa reads children’s letters in the office instead of in the loo.
  3. Santa never explains what exactly it was that you did to deserve that coal in your stocking.  If you have to ask, maybe that’s the problem!
  4. In spite of a closet full of red coats with big black belts, Santa insists there is nothing to wear on Christmas Eve.
  5. A man simply would not care if you were naughty or nice.
  6. Bowl full of jelly?  More likely water retention.
  7. Matching shoes and belt? Only a woman would accesorise a suit like that!
  8. Santa has never been observed peeing off rooftops.
  9. No guy would ever name his animals Dancer and Prancer.
  10. Santa is constantly whining about equality until it’s time to clean out the reindeer stalls.

More English jokes here