The following are some of the winners in a New York magazine contest, in which the rules were: take ANY well-known phrase in ANY foreign language, change JUST ONE SINGLE LETTER, and then provide a definition for the new expression.

HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS? – Can you drive a French motorcycle?

EX POST FUCTO – Lost in the mail

IDIOS AMIGOS – We’re wild and crazy guys

VENI, VIPI, VICI – I came, I’m a very important person, I conquered

COGITO, EGGO SUM – I think, therefore I waffle

RIGOR MORRIS – The cat is dead

RESPONDEZ S’IL VOUS PLAID – Honk if you’re Scottish

QUE SERA SERF – Life is feudal

LE ROI EST MORT, JIVE LE ROI – The king is dead. No kidding

POSH MORTEM – Death styles of the rich and famous

PRO BOZO PUBLICO – Support your local clown

MONAGE A TROIS – I am three years old

FELIX NAVIDAD – Our cat has a boat

HASTE CUISINE – Fast French food

VENI, VIDI, VICE – I came, I saw, I partied

QUIP PRO QUO – A fast retort

ALOHA OY – Love; greetings, farewell; from such a pain you should never know

MAZEL TON – Tons of good luck

APRES MOE LE DELUGE – Curly and Larry got wet

PORT-KOCHERE – Sacramental wine

ICH LIEBE RICH – I’m really crazy about having dough

FUI GENERIS – What’s mine is mine

VISA LA FRANCE – Don’t leave your chateau without it

CA VA SANS DIRT – And that’s not gossip

MERCI RIEN – Thanks for nothin’

AMICUS PURIAE – Platonic friend

Thanks to Cheri for this one!