A selection of headlines from stories in the news. They use English in a way that you might think is intended to confuse but it's all perfectly clear to the native speaker.
The Beatles are very much in the news at the moment (50 years since their first single) and the Daily Mirror reported that unseen footage has been discovered of the group visiting a chip shop in Taunton, Somerset in 1967 during the filming of Magical Mystery Tour. The headline of 'Plaice Please Me' is a play on the group's 1963 No.1 hit, 'Please Please Me', substituting 'plaice (a species of fish) for the first 'please'.