Assembler: First, it builds the road ……
C: It crosses the road without looking both ways.
C++: Wouldn’t have to cross the road, you’ d simply refer to him on the other side.
COBOL: 0001-COMPUTER-CROSSING.Why did the Computer Cross the Road?
THEN PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
GO TO 0001-COMPUTER-CROSSING
Cray: Crosses faster than any other computer, but if you don’t dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side frazzled.
Delphi: The computer is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.
Gopher: Tried to run but got beaten by the Web browser.
Intel Pentium: The computer crossed 4.9999978 times.
Iomega: The computer should have ‘ backed up’ before crossing.
Java: If your road needs to be crossed by a computer, then the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are tablets.) See also WMI Monitor.
Linux: Don’t you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!
Mac: No reasonable computer owner would want a computer to cross the road, so there’s no way to tell it how to cross the road.
Newton Chicken: Can’t cluck, can’t fly, and can’t lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket.
OOP: It doesn’t need to cross the road, it just sends a message.
OS/2: It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.
Microsoft: It’s already on both sides of the road. What’s more it’s just bought the road.
NT: Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.
Quantum Logic: The computer is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.
XP Computer Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.
Longhorn had an identity crisis and is now calling itself Vista.
Windows 7 – Gave up half way across.
Windows 8 – Waiting for Windows 7 to finish crossing.
Android – Is rolling up the road.
The Vista Chicken dazzled itself with its own graphics.