Signing Christmas cards is fraught with danger, and what should you call a British sausage.

NORTH POLE (API) - Microsoft announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's estate somewhere in the southern hemisphere. In the deal, Microsoft would gain exclusive rights to Christmas, reindeer, and other unspecified inventions. In addition, Microsoft will gain access to millions of households […]

I saw this lovely little Christmassy snippet in the Shropshire Star:- Shoppers might not have believed their mince pies when they saw what a supermarket had on offer. For days a misspelt sign at Sainsbury's supermarket in Dartford, Kent, advertised packs of icing-topped 'mice' pies, instead of mince pies. It's a wonder they didn't have […]

Today’s global challenges require the North Pole to continue to look forbetter, more competitive steps. Effective immediately, the following economymeasures are to take place in the “Twelve Days of Christmas” subsidiary: 1. The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by […]

I don't often post links, and this one is a teeny bit rude, but very funny. Just make sure you type your real name when asked:- http://www.busybus.co.uk/design/xmas_santa.swf

A Church of England bishop has criticised some Christmas carols as nonsense and suggested others exhibit "Victorian behaviour control". For example, in his book, "Why Wish You a Merry Christmas", the Rt Rev Nick Baines, the bishop of Croydon, takes a verse of Once in Royal David's City as an example of a carol with […]