I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen...and replaced by exact duplicates. I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back. Half the people you know are below average. 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 42.7% of all statistics […]

Miss Alabama when asked: "If you could live forever, would you want to, and why?" answered, "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." "Smoking kills. […]

"The secret of a happy marriage? It remains a secret." Henny Youngman "My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met."Rodney Dangerfield "Marriage is a wonderful invention; but then again, so is a bicycle repair kit." Billy Connelly "Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener!"Anonymous "A woman asked her […]