A girl was visiting her boyfriend, who had got two new dogs. She asked him what he was going to call them. He told her one was named Rolex and the other one Timex. Surprised she said, ‘Whoever heard of someone calling their dogs Rolex and Timex?’‘Think about it,’ answered her boyfriend, ‘They’re ‘watch’ dogs!’
A police constable pulls a driver over for speeding:
Constable: May I see your driver’s license?
Driver: I don’t have one. It was suspended when I got caught over the limit.
A group of retired farmers were travelling by tour bus through Devon.
They stopped for a tour at a dairy, and a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that at this particular dairy goat’s milk was used.
A pregnant woman is in a car accident and goes into a coma. After nearly six months, she wakes up to find that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor replies, “Don’t worry, you had twins! We had to do a C-section, but you had a boy […]
A nutritionist was giving a presentation at a conference. “The stuff we eat is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago,” he said.