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Once upon a time there lived a King and a Queen, who didn't differ much from all the other kings and queens who have lived since time began, except they had no children, and this made them very sad indeed.

Now it so happened that the King had to go and fight battles in a far country, and he was away for many long months. And lo and behold! While he was away the Queen at long last bore him a little son. As you may imagine she was fair delighted, and thought how pleased the King would be when he came home and found that his dearest wish had been fulfilled. And all the courtiers were fine and pleased too, and set about at once to arrange a grand festival for the naming of the little Prince. But the Queen said, "No! The child shall have no name till his father gives it to him. Till then we will call him 'Nix! Naught! Nothing!' because his father knows nothing about him!"

A man was telling his neighbour 'I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art .... It's perfect.' 'Really,' answered the neighbour. 'What kind is it?' 'Twelve thirty..'

Two newlyweds were arguing about who should brew the coffee each morning.The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." The husband said, "You are in charge of the housework around here so you should do it, because that […]

  I made myself a snowballAs perfect as can be.I thought I'd keep it as a pet,And let it sleep with me.I made it some pyjamasAnd a pillow for its head.Then last night it ran away,But first - It wet the bed.

  By muddybunny