English Joke – Lies

A police constable pulls a driver over for speeding:

Constable: May I see your driver’s license?

Driver: I don’t have one. It was suspended when I got caught over the limit.

English Joke – Growing Old

A group of retired farmers were travelling by tour bus through Devon.

They stopped for a tour at a dairy, and a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that at this particular dairy goat’s milk was used.

English Joke – Dangerous Food


A nutritionist was giving a presentation at a conference.  “The stuff we eat is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago,” he said.

English Joke – OId Dogs


An old Doberman starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he’s lost. Wandering about, he sees a panther stalking him in the bushes.

The old Doberman thinks, “Oh, oh! I’m in trouble now!”