This is great for teaching 'why - because' structure. There's somebody out there who's very well read and put an awful lot of time and attention into this one... Karl Marx - It was a historical inevitability. Thomas de Torquemada - Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out. Timothy Leary - […]
As I mentioned previously in the blog (see The Madness Continues) I am the unfortunate recipient of many dodgy e-mails. Now usually they have no relevance to me what so ever. In fact sometimes they are so irrelevant that it would be funny, if they weren't so disgusting. However, today someone, from a company I […]
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. The […]
Thanks to Peter for these amusing answering machine messages:- Hi. Now you say something." "Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep." "You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on,wasting your time. I mean, all […]
What is the speed of dark? When you're sending someone styrofoam, what do you pack it in? If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras? How come you never hear about gruntled employees? What is a "free" gift? Aren't […]
Some profound thoughts:- Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it. Drive carefully. It's not only cars that […]